This great country, Pakistan, provided a sanctuary for the minority of the subcontinent. Yes, this great country, whose great leader told everyone that go to your temples, worship as you want. Such a fantastic country! Everybody has their rights. Christians go to Church, have Sunday mass. Hindus go to their temples worship whoever they want. So much happiness! Minorities have heaven in the shape of Pakistan. We Muslims protect them. We give them seats in the parliament. Yes, it’s a great opportunity for them to mingle with us righteous Muslims in the parliament. Yes! we let them sit with us. Have a nap or two in the parliament with us. Such a heaven!
Us magnificent Muslims give them jobs, oh yes, even jobs. We try and make it specialized for them. So we pushed them to the margins of the society so that they can clean up our gutters and sewage. It’s a specialized skill isn’t it? We are doing them a favor aren’t we? Oh we are such beautiful people. We care so much. We bomb a church or a temple. Yeah, they require renovations anyway. It’s a favor isn’t it? Burn a Christian or two alive, what difference does it make, we did them a favor, they will go to heaven. So many favors we do.
If they say something against us, oh yeah, we put them in jail, death penalty and all that. Who wants these poor illiterate people speaking up their mind? Yeah we do them a favor. They get our finest police food in the prison, some punches, some whips, some rape. Yeah it’s a favor, food, work-out, and sex, all the excitement you need in one place.
Oh I forgot our beloved Ahmadi or Qadiani. We had the honor to turn them into a minority because we wanted to treat them so much better. We made beautiful laws for their easiness. They are not allowed to call any person Ameer ul Momineen (leader of all the Muslims) besides the Holy Prophet (PBUH) and the actual Caliphs. They can’t even say Razi Allah unho (may God be please with him). Yeah it’s a favor. Who needs so much formality, if they want to pray for someone that God be please with them, they don’t have to, it’s all good, it OK. We call Mullah Umer of Taliban Ameer ul Momineen but we are the beautiful Muslims; we can do anything we want. They cant call their place of worship a “Masjid”, we proactive Muslims have patented this word with God, so even though Masjid mean a place of prostration, we Muslims, try to save them the trouble, because God might send them to hell, so if they use it we put them in jail, remember the heavenly place with all the free food, work-out and sex. Three years of all that, we are so good to them.
They are not allowed to propagate their faith, why should they? They should just sit and relax at home. We can do all the propagating; they don’t want to walk around door to door, fly around the world talk about their religion. No No, its OK, they should sit at home have some tea. And if they do get caught propagating, we send them to that heavenly jail – free food, work-out and sex. We are so great. Yes we have such big hearts; there is nothing wrong with us. It’s the world that is against us. It is a Zionist conspiracy. We are poor because of the Zionists, we are corrupt because of the Zionists. We kill people for religion because it is the fault of the Zionists. Actually we are the best, the beautiful people. There is nothing wrong with us. We put our women at home, hit them, kill them, and rape them for honor. We are actually very honorable people. It’s the Zionists who spread the bad word about us.
It is not only Pakistan. We are so honorable that we fight each other all around the world also. Oh yes we do. We like our small pieces of land. Allah has given us so much Oil, so much money. But why should we spend that money on poor people and minorities, they don’t want the money, money is too much stress, we don’t want to give them stress, we just make huge buildings with it, 800m in Dubai, 1km in Jeddah, oh yes so much tension and stress, we don’t want to give it to the poor and the minorities. Gaza and West Bank burns. Let it burn. It doesn’t concern us. We are fighting each other for honor and all that sort of thing. Gaza and West Bank has nothing to do with us anyway. It’s the Zionist fault. Nothing to do with us! We are pure, innocent, honorable, considerate, peaceful, and perfect. There is nothing wrong with us. It’s the Zionist’s fault. We are the best.
Bleeding Humanity 